As a clinical psychologist, Molly knew her experience was a normal response to a life-changing event. But without the advantage of such a perspective, many of the patients she treated in her private practice grappled with self-doubt, guilt, and fear, and suffered the dual pain of not only the struggle to adjust but also the overwhelming shame for struggling at all. Hidup Alice berubah sewaktu perusahaan tempat Joe bekerja mentransfer Joe ke New York karena Joe ketauan berselingkuh dengan Josie, salah satu karyawan perusahaan itu.

Ini merupakan buku pertama Jane Green yg kubaca.Buku ini dibeli saat mengikuti diklat di Yogyakarta, Des 2011 dengan harga obral,tujuannya untuk hiburan dimalam hari berhubung kamar di Wisma Balai Diklat Yogyakarta tidak disediakan TV. TV hanya ada diruang makan dan lobby.(Disuruh belajar boo..hehe). Tapi ternyata sampai diklat selama seminggu berakhir,buku ini ngga sempat dibaca karena kami lebih banyak menghabiskan waktu untuk berburu batik dan kuliner di sekitar Jogja sehabis mengikuti kelas..:) Jadilah buku ini baru dibaca akhir Maret, menemani cuti seminggu selama di Jakarta,tapi baru tuntas setelah di Pontianak lagi..ini sdh blm ya reviunya.. Powerful and important. Should be required reading for couples before their first kid is born, since a huge share of the challenges that arise with the transition to parenthood stem from misaligned expectations. Yeah sure, the logistics and the sleep and the finances are hard, but they are concrete problems that are solvable. It's the nebulous feelings that are corrosive. Preparation -- even just knowing to anticipate that your marriage and your self-identity will get rattled -- makes a huge difference in making it through relatively unscathed.

CHAPTER IV IN WHICH I AM LIKE TO REPENT AT LEISURE

Mothers often feel a wholly new relationship to time when they have a baby. That's normal. It's OK not to use every free moment to its utmost potential and instead to relax. First, there was an infuriating chapter on birth that was poorly researched and used the Business of Being Born as a completely serious footnote. Yikes! Skip it no matter who you are but definitely if you had a traumatic birth. The author wants to treat this audience with care, but falls far short of writing about this painful subject with an objective and kind point of view. I think she puts too much emphasis on physiologic birth because this was her experience. She is correct, however, in pointing out how the memory of birth lives on for the birthing person long, long after the day passes, and that there is little attention to the importance of telling the birth story as a means of emotional healing. For a better researched resource on this subject (obstetric violence, etc), seek out Evidence Based Birth (an org with classes, a podcast, etc) or the book “Babies Aren’t Pizzas.” The medicalization of birth may be a problem, but the cult of zero-intervention birth is hardly better from where I'm sitting. Most of us live in the vast universe between Ina May Gaskin and elective belly birth and you will not find help with processing how your attempts to find that middle ground may have foundered through no fault of your own here. On the importance of paternity leave: "It might cost the family more money if Dad takes parental leave, but that might be income extremely well 'spent' if it is viewed as a kind of insurance policy against developing gendered power imbalances in the relationship, and the marital dissatisfaction that comes with them." (99) Además, si algo tiene este libro, es que te entran ganas de comprarte una casita en las afueras, vivir una vida tranquila, pasar tus días dando paseos por la playa con tu perro y cuidando de tu jardín y contemplando las estrellas y disfrutando del silencio por la noche. El estrés de la ciudad apesta cada día más. Fast-moving . . . entertaining . . . a roller-coaster ride of serendipitous fun.” — Publishers Weekly on Mr. and Miss Anonymous

Even progressive couples often revert to traditional divisions of labor in parenthood. Also, couples frequently suffer when they become parents. Try to see what's underneath the arguments and the friction. It's often an unmet need. A former journalist in the UK, she has had her own radio show on BBC Radio London, and is a regular contributor on radio and TV, including as well as regularly appearing on television shows including Good Morning America, The Martha Stewart show, and The Today Show. This book reminded me of one of those entertaining lower-budget films about love. The films that have sort-of famous actors; the movies that are so cheesy and clichéd but you enjoy them all the same because they just work. They're a little far-fetched and predictable but they're just a pleasure to watch. I enjoyed the book the exact same way I would enjoy one of these movies. This doesn't actually work for a lot of books but it did with this one and that's why I decided to give this book 4 stars.

I am a huge fan of Jane Green books, with bookends being my favourite. When I was in the library I saw Spellbound which is a book of Jane Green which I have yet to read and obviously I couldn't walk over it. The complex truths of motherhood will continue to make everyone uncomfortable and ashamed until they're articulated readily and repeatedly. (220) Reprinted in 1931 with personal notes about the author and illustrator Frank E. Schoonover at 331p.

Try to reframe "problems" and get rid of your expectations. A clingy baby is not a problem, just someone who wants comfort. Try to feel and accept the pain when things don't go as you might wish them to, rather than suffer by resisting, fearing, or denying what's actually happening. Similarly, if you feel guilt, question why and try to determine if it's valid. (Apparently women experience guilt as parents much more than men.) She is the author of eighteen previous New York Times Bestselling novels, and known as one of the world's leading authors in women's fiction, with over ten million books in print, and translations in over 25 languages. Watching Alice just be in denial about her husband nightly activities with other women was frustratingly painful. I felt bad for her, but I was also furious with her. Even if she didn’t know her husband was cheating, she wasn’t happy at all. I would’ve left a long time ago. But the signs were there and she ignored them. I wanted her to find out sooner than she did. I wanted pain, suffering and retribution from Joe. I wanted the second half of the book to be more about her and Harry. I feel like Harry’s apparent feelings for her were a bit out of the blue, but you can kind of see how that happens. I love the way the ending of the book takes each of the characters from the book and tells you how they ended up later in life. I have always wondered after reading books what would actually happen to the characters and this answered all my questions. In my opinion an outstanding ending. But that’s just the problem. Despite Alice’s efforts to be the perfect wife, Joe soon reveals a penchant for being hopelessly unfaithful. When a notorious indiscretion with a female colleague forces Joe to transfer to New York, Alice’s life turns upside down. As Joe continues to sneak around, and her best friend’s beau offers a tempting glimpse of what real love could be like, Alice must decide how much Cinderella she can take before her deepest desires win out—and if she can summon up the courage to find real happiness on her own.

Johnston, writing from Percy’s point of view, portrays Jocelyn in epic terms: “As I gazed with all my eyes, I found more than grace and beauty in that wonderful face,—found pride, wit, fire, determination, finally shame and anger.” Lord Carnal, as his name unsubtly suggests, represents a threatening and dishonorable sexuality: “The bravado with which he spoke, the insolence of his bold glance and curled lip, the arrogance with which he flaunted that King’s favor which should be a brand more infamous than the hangman’s, his beauty, the pomp of his dress,—all were alike hateful.” Most writers love what they do and I’m no exception. I love it when I get a germ of an idea and get it down on paper. I love breathing life into my characters. I love writing about women who persevere and prevail because that’s what I had to do to get to this point in time. It’s another way of saying it doesn’t matter where you’ve been, what matters is where you’re going and how you get there. The day I finally prevailed was the day I was inducted into the New Jersey Literary Hall of Fame. For me it was an awesome day and there are no words to describe it.

I think there's quite a bit you can get out of this book especially if you are a middle-class, white, straight, married mother of young kids. I fall into that category and the book resonated with me, but I'm not sure how much it would for readers in other demographics. I liked the personal accounts of women in therapy with the author - it was relatable and it got her point across well, that mothers are struggling with things silently even if on the outside things appear great. She made some good points about social media - how even the "relatable," "honest" mommy bloggers and influencers portray a picture of a kind of studied messiness. I follow a lot of accounts in that category and I have noticed how even when they're posting about looking and feeling tired or worn out, their hair and makeup is on point and carefully disheveled; how a lot of the posts have to do with the mundane things that everyone knows are trying about motherhood - cleaning up spills, dealing with a crying baby - but not the big emotions like fear, anger, resentment, intrusive thoughts, doubt, etc. that might go along with the experience of motherhood. In the [United] States, a woman is looked after, by herself and by others, only so long as her body is a receptacle for the baby. Attention then transfers to the needs of the infant. To ask for respite to betray not only weakness and helplessness, but selfishness. You should be prepared for the emotional and physical demands of your new motherly role and you should like them, too.I enjoyed how conversational Millwood's book feels, like you're not being lectured at but actually seen, that your feelings are valid and your fears are taken seriously. Millwood covers a range of important topics, such as the loss of self, the isolating state of modern American motherhood, the very real stress that children bring to a marriage, and how to move forward with your new life. Millwood works to correct her "dismay at how many books there are about pregnancy and childbirth and how few books there are about the complete metamorphosis we undergo once we become parents." (86) at the end when Joe is thrown out he is in denial and he is sorry that he got caught he was expecting Alice to forgive him after all he is a red blooded male and she has forgiven him in the past(i skipped in between but one dialogue gave me this impression when he is thrown out) A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood Richard Wilson ( Peggy For You) and Terry Johnson ( Prism) both return to Hampstead Theatre to co-direct this production. Joe is a serial womaniser and often goes home with a different woman after ring Alice to inform her he will not be home as he has to work late yet again. Alice has her suspicions but never talks about it to Joe.